I sometimes think that the way women think of themselves and their role in the world has everything to do with how they - and the rest of us - think of abortion. Is it, then, as some say, a woman's inherent right to control what happens to her body in every circumstance? Is it, on the other hand, in no case morally acceptable to permit or participate in an abortion? Is the truth of the matter really summed up in the words "pro-life" or "pro-choice?" Or is it possible to be both?
I am interested in speaking as if to those women who will ever have to make these decisions for themselves, while talking about the underlying principles which are, to me, the heart and soul of the matter. These principles, while at the foundation of everything that happens on this earth, are more far-reaching than any worldly concern. They are true, and so some of them are hard to hear.
You Are Made for Sacrifice
One thing is certain: you, women, are they into whom God has entrusted the souls of men, of all mankind. Women are the chalice of life.
Life is about risk and sacrifice, and motherhood is the summit, the pinnacle, the embodiment and fullness of what it means to sacrifice. It is synonymous with what it means to be a woman, and when that call to motherhood is fully answered, the full range of the unique qualities of womanhood have their full expression and development. And it should give you some pause to realize that you were built, were made to sacrifice in this way. It is part of you, and much more a part of you than any lifestyle or philosophy of any time, culture, or place could ever be. And you should be honored, because you are the sole hope of life for humanity, and more to the point, for each individual life that God places into your trust. The miracle of life occurs inside of you, as the soul of another joins your own. It's all about giving. Especially for you. Especially when it's not convenient or kind, or comfortable, or fair, or easy, or predictable. Truly was is said "nothing ventured, nothing gained." And the amount of risk we experience in this life should be a good indicator to us of what fantastic rewards await us if we are faithful.
The Power and Consequences of Choice
And so, yes, it's a choice. It's always been about a choice. This part of life, as all others, is all about making the right choice. In other words, the choice is yours, but not the right to knowingly make the wrong one. There are consequences and accountability for each one, some of which are perceived and experienced here, but others of which are not until this life is over.
It is essential to count the costs and consequences of a choice before making it. In this case, a life hangs in the balance- one which, if allowed to continue its natural development, will have every chance of living a full life, and who is as much a human being as you are. Add to this the incomparable experience of becoming a parent, and the fantastic opportunity for change which it involves. Even if you put your child up for adoption, the experience can change you. I promise you also that searing remorse will inevitably follow if you place any other less important consideration over the life of a child.
I believe what leaders of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints have said on this matter. Elective abortion for personal or social convenience is akin to murder. There are only a few exceptional circumstances in which abortion might be justified - but even these are not to be considered automatic approvals for abortion. That is a decision which must be made only with the express revelation from our Heavenly Father that the course of action is acceptable. Those few exceptions spoken of are as follows:
"...such as when pregnancy is the result of incest or rape, when the life or health of the mother is judged by competent medical authority to be in serious jeopardy, or when the fetus is known by competent medical authority to have severe defects that will not allow the baby to survive beyond birth."Source: https://www.lds.org/topics/abortion?lang=eng .
Consider for a moment that God is the most "pro-choice" being who ever lived; He is the
champion of agency - the right for each of His children, knowing right and wrong, to determine their own choices and reap the natural consequences. He is the one who accepted death and all the tortures of hell and earth which the devil and man could invent, so that you could have your freedom to choose either good or evil. So the question is, what will you do with it? Tell me, what is it worth to us if we abuse it?
Or what is it saying to God if you or I shrink from that high road he took to its end, to its furthest and deepest paths, right into the mouth of the abyss, and we won't even set foot on its entrance? You will find many who will say you have every reason to be excused from the burden of motherhood if you don't want it or don't feel ready. I believe, however, that for one with perfect love, the reality of the matter is self-evident.
God is also the most "pro-life" being in the universe. He is our Creator and Father, and has explicitly stated that life, especially human life, is sacred. There is no way to disrespect the greatest of God's creations - his children - and retain proper devotion and respect for God.
In one way or another, we are all made to suffer. To do it voluntarily and for a purpose is the calling we are all meant to answer, and it is the difference between a life fully lived and one of regret. In other words, our challenge is to learn to love as Christ did, and center our
lives around service to others. This pure love of Christ is called charity.
Motherhood is a Call to Charity
So to choose to raise a child, or when this is not possible, to give birth and place the child for adoption, is a Christlike expression of love.
I will never feel or imagine the sufferings or anguish of a mother. I don't know or "get it." But what price is too great for the life of a child?
Even the most precious worldly things, or life itself, is worth giving up for charity. This is what Peter is talking about when he says that a man without charity is nothing; he is a hollow shell of what he might have been.
Can you imagine life in a society in which no one sacrificed for another? Does it really all have to be about rights and freedoms? What a hollow life it would be to worry only about what is due you, and giving only what you must. It is, however, a constant temptation. The life well lived is full of danger and risk. It's about making yourself a target for pain and ridicule, and taking on responsibilities that you never had to take on. In other words, there's a better way. And no matter what anyone else says, who lives a more fulfilling life than a mother?
Shouldn't the most innocent, the most weak and helpless among us, be the most protected? After all, the pleas of babes and sucklings tear at our heart, but that same child one month, one week, one day, or even one hour younger does not seem to be able to wrench from us the same pangs of tenderness and compassion, or else the same bitter tears of remorse that we feel when an infant passes on, be it ever so peacefully or easily.
But what I wish to do is to recognize the very real pain, fear, and worry that the mother of an unplanned or unwanted child feels when she realizes the choices before her. I recognize that, and so does God. But don't see that dilemma as the unfair imposition of an unkind circumstance; see it as the call to be what you're meant to be. This kind of sacrifice is the closest any of us will get to godliness in this life, and it is hard because this kind of prize doesn't come cheap.
But God will not force you to take that leap. He won't make you a willing mother without your consent. He has left it up to you, and it is sometimes a hard choice.
And so whether I speak now to a cold heart or a warm one, a cynic or a saint, let me ask you this: what hope have you for our race if we do not learn to treasure life? Or to respect the fountains of life to which we all owe our own existences? Is it not a great irony that hordes of modern men and women have risen up to defend the downtrodden, to protect entire despised races, to lift men from the dust and poverty in which they have and do still wallow, but even these have forgotten those most vulnerable, out of sight and therefore out of mind? We grieve over the life cut short, that perennial subject of tragedies, but shed, perhaps, hardly a tear for that life which hardly had time to begin. Tragedies both, but which do you imagine God would find more heartwrenching?
So, yes - your choice is not easy, and to be a mother can be a frightening commitment. It is to think of others above yourself, and to turn your life upside down. God will help you look outside yourself and realize that your child's welfare and your own are not in conflict but intertwined.
But it's up to you. It's your choice.
